It's one of the supreme tragedies in life. When there's just one girl you want, it becomes much tougher to get her.
No matter how much of a player some guys are, we've all had that one girl we want. It could be that hot babe in your office who you've had a crush on. Or it could be that beautiful woman in your college class who you dream of having as the perfect girlfriend.
You see, a lot of times guys mess themselves up by focusing on just one girl. That's because having that narrow focus kills whatever attraction she might have for you. This attraction killer is... FEELING NEEDY AND DESPERATE.
When you're needy and desperate, and you start thinking that any girl is one of a kind, then you become like the cartoon lover skunk Pepe Le Pieux chasing the cat. And your odds of success are about the same as his.
So with that in mind, in this article you'll learn strategies for how exactly to stop killing the natural attraction that special girl has for you. Then you'll learn how to maximize your chances to get the girl you want.
Strategy #1: Realize That Other Girls Are Just As Special As She Is
Do not sweat it about that one girl. I promise you that although she may be awesome, there are tons of other girls out there who are just as great as she is.
No matter what good quality she has (silky hair? good in the kitchen? a sense of humor?), there are millions of other hot women with that exact same good quality.
This comes from massive experience... not only from my own two and a half decades dating hundreds and hundreds of women, but from comparing notes with other guys who are good with girls.
Believe me when I tell you, there is literally NOTHIN that any woman has that is unique ONLY to her.
So don't worry about how special she is. Of course she's special -- lots of girls are!
The last thing you ever want to have going through your mind when you're around a girl is, "God, I MUST have this girl! She's irreplaceable!"
So, you're free to think she's amazing. Just remember that lots of other girls are amazing too. That way you won't become too needy.
Strategy #2: Date Other Women to Get That One Girl
Now, I know it's tough to not worry about a woman if she's the only dating prospect in your life right now. So the solution is to make yourself hang out with other girls. This will also pay benefits to you in other ways, using a basic principal of psychology to increase your "value." I'll explain.
You see, whenever a woman sees that other chicks are attracted to a guy, she too feels attraction. Psychologically, this is known as the "social proof" phenomenon... and it's much more powerful in women than men.
To women, the most attractive guy is the one who's surrounded by other women. So, ironically, the best way to get this special girl attracted to you is for her to discover that she'd have to compete with other women.
That way you become a challenge. She's the one who has to win your affections, not the other way around.
Strategy #3: Change Your Mindset About Women to Get That Girl
A simple change in your attitude will cure your feelings of neediness and desperation for any particular woman. Warning: it's politically incorrect. However, it's effective and, ironically, will maximize your chances of getting her.
That change is this... start viewing chicks as "one woman with many faces." That way you won't get too wrapped in any ONE chick.
If you get to know players -- you know, those guys who've slept with dozens of women and can get any chick they want -- you'll find that's the exact attitude that every one of them has.
So forget coming from a frame of neediness. A better frame to come from is the mindset that you have high value, and any attention you give her has been EARNED by her. That way, even though she is the one girl you want, you'll avoid the attraction killer and have the best odds of success. |
