What do you think of this storyline? A polite couple waits patiently to buy movie tickets and concessions, and then finds empty seats in the auditorium a few rows away from others. They laugh and cry with the audience at all the right times, eat their snacks quietly, then pick up their trash at the end of the film and go home. If only real-life movie theater experiences had such happy endings! Actually movie theaters often bring out the worst behavior in people because they falsely believe that the cloak of darkness grants them anonymity and immunity. They may talk too loudly (and too often), block your view with hats, hair, or height, or sit behind you in order to kick your chair or prop their smelly feet a few inches from your face. The ultimate movie theater rudeness, however, is when someone sits right in front of you in an otherwise empty auditorium. Even with stadium seating that staggers seat heights, this aggressive act is clearly a power struggle, a challenge to see if they can get you to move to another seat. To help film lovers everywhere enjoy their experiences more, heres a list of suggestions for movie manners everyone should follow whether in the theater, at a film festival, or an outdoor event. Entering the Theater 1. Arrive early so you won't disturb others by interrupting the previews or main attraction. 2. When someone enters your row after you've been seated, either stand or swing your knees in the direction they're heading to ease their passage. 3. If you anticipate leaving during the movie (going out for a smoke, visiting the bathroom, removing a crying child etc.), arrive early and take an aisle seat near the exit. Better yet, leave the child at home with a sitter. 4. If you arrive late, stay in the rear of the auditorium until your eyes adjust to the darkness and you can more easily find seats without blocking the view of others. Say a polite excuse me if you walk in front of people. During the Movie 1. Take off your hat. Sit near the back if your hair or height may block the view of other people. 2. Leave cell phones, beepers and laser pens in the car. 3. From the moment the opening credits roll to the end of the closing credits, dont talk. If you must say something, whisper quietly into someones ear. 4. Take noisy children outside the auditorium. 5. Eat quietly. This includes chewing with your mouth shut, unwrapping noisy packages quickly and refraining from jiggling soft drinks and popcorn containers. 6. Keep your feet on the floor at all times. 7. Don't kick the seats in front of you or use them as leverage to help you get up (unless no one is seated in the entire row). 8. Quickly remove yourself or child from the theater at the onset of a coughing attack, non-stop running nose, series of sneezes or other bodily noises. 9. If you can't resist the urge to make-out, at least do it in the back of the theater. The sights, sounds and conjoined heads are very distracting to those behind you. 10. If you've seen the film before, don't tell people what's going to happen next. Never reveal the ending. Exiting the Theater 1. Pick up and discard your candy wrappers, empty boxes and cups. 2. Dont stand around in the auditorium talking; some people stay to watch the credits and you may be blocking their view. 3. Don't try to psyche out the people waiting in line by giving them a thumbs up or some other signal. At Film Festivals 1. Pass holders go first into the theater before individual ticket holders. Thats why they bought passes. 2. Keep negative comments about the movies to yourself until youre outside the theater. Many filmmakers attend their own screenings at festivals. 3. If you must leave early for any reason (including that you absolutely hate the movie), leave quickly and quietly so you wont disturb others who absolutely love the movie. 4. Treat festival workers nicely; most of them are volunteers. Outdoor Movie Events 1. Even though you can smoke outside, try to be considerate of others. The wind might be blowing smoke directly into the face of someone who is allergic to smoke. Move away from others when you need a cigarette. 2. Dont bring radios or other noisy distractions to an outdoor movie. 3. Leave your pets at home. Dogs bark and leave messes for others to step in. Watching a great movie with a considerate, respectful audience is a wonderful experience. A good audience provides a sense of community that can add to the overall enjoyment of a movie, especially with a comedy or horror film. But all it takes is one chair-kicking, scene-spoiling, chain-smoking movie-goer to ruin it for everyone. May I suggest (in the nicest way possible, of course) that if these suggestions seem too restrictive for you, then you might want to consider an alternative to going out to the movie theater. Your best option may be to watch movies in the comfort of your own home where the cloak of darkness really does provide anonymity and immunity. Copyright 2006 Leslie Halpern |
